Sunny days and mothercare

We had a reasonable weekend for a change. It has been pissing down in Bangalore these past few weeks but this weekend it was nice, at least where we are. On Saturday we were out and about and I went with daddy to the bank and to see our old house. Daddy went to pay the security man the money he owed from last month and the cheeky devil asked daddy for a tip. As daddy said to me, "I don't get tipped for sitting on my arse all day long." I might have added, "No daddy, but you don't actually do any work either do you?" Anyway, the man didn't get his tip, but ten out of ten for having the audacity to ask for one. These are all useful things that I'm learning for when I'm older and I just hope that the Indian blood in me gives me sufficient boldness to say and do those things that are common in India but taboo in England (where daddy comes from.)

Last week daddy had an eye infection and he'd squeezed a spot on his nose and made it red. "What happened to your eye, daddy?" I asked. And before he had time to answer, I followed up with, "and what happened to your nose daddy?" I guess that those questions are OK coming from me, but it's when you go to your local shop, or meet somebody on the street and they ask the same questions that it enters the realms of taboo.

Anyway, enough of all that. What do I know, I'm just a kid, and as the old saying goes, if you want to hear the truth about something, ask a drunk or a kid. As for drunk kids, avoid them like the plague.

Daddy also looked at some furniture for my bedroom on Saturday because ever since we moved, all my toys and my books and my jigsaws have been shoved in a great big box and they're in a right state. I'm not the tidiest child at the best of times but having Nowhere to put all my stuff doesn't really foster a tidy spirit. Daddy knows this and so he's going to have to fork out lots of money to buy me some new cupboards. Little does he know that I'm still going to be just as untidy and ruthless with my books when they're all sitting neatly on shelves.

Yesterday, whilst mummy was at church we went to a park nearby to where we used to live. That's become a bit of a routine for us. Mummy goes to commune with God and daddy and I go to some desperate bloody junk-heap of a park populated by street urchins and either semi-waterlogged or leaking raw sewage. This week, daddy opted for the water-logged park and I spent a happy thirty seconds climbing up the steps on the main climbing frame before I got bored and daddy and I just walked round the place, me doing a balancing act on a low wall while daddy held on to me. In England I think they'd called this place a swing rec - short for recreation. Over here, they'd call it a swing wreck.

We stopped at the park for about half an hour and then to kill time, we went for a short drive, then picked up mummy and headed out for lunch. I never really eat very much when I'm out but I like to think I keep mummy and daddy on their toes by a) nearly knocking over my drink b) screaming or shrieking c) bouncing up and down in my seat d) suddenly disappearing under the table e) suddenly heading off towards another table f) all five of the previous options.

After lunch we went home, fetched Mark and then went to Mothercare where they have a sale on. Mothercare is one of those places in Bangalore where the goods in the shop are actually more expensive than the same things in England. I sat down on a chair with daddy and Mark while mummy spent more of daddy's money on clothes for Mark and a skirt for me. I played with a couple of kids there as well but one of them was so bossy that even I was taken aback. Normally I'm the one who tells people what to do but this girl took the biscuit. She even unpacked a doctor's uniform and I'm sure she would have started performing open heart surgery on a cuddly dog had a lady in the shop not intervened.

After Mothercare we went upstairs to Brio and had coffee and cake and listened to some woman in a band slaughtering various well-known numbers. Nevertheless I jumped up and down while they were performing and the lady noticed and smiled over at me. I don't know what she was smiling for, I was busting for the loo and jumping up and down was the only thing that prevented me from wetting all over the seat. We rounded off the day by popping along to Baby Shop where mummy spent more of daddy's money and Mark got yet more clothes.

This morning, I registered with the Metro Mela website and left reviews for Mothercare, Baby Shop, Toys N Toys, Apple of My Eye. Strange that none of them have websites. You can got to Metro Mela and check out my reviews. Click on Bangalore and look for Motts.